the waiting game

here i sit waiting for the gas man at friends house.

here i sit waiting…..

waiting….

and

waiting.

i have also been processing

it took longer than usual this time

dont think im done yet

but needing to see the words.

ya know what i mean

we last went to mda a month ago yesterday

the mri indicated that blob was exerting control again

the bastard

you already know this cuz you saw the link to the surgeons trial so…

since this time last month

we have been in limbo

waiting.

waiting for news of fda approval

waiting to hear if honey is approved for phase 2

waiting for the chemo drugs to be completely out of his system

just waiting

 

three weeks ago now big corporation

henceforth bigc

told him that they were going to remove him from employee roster

because he cannot return to his old position any time soon

this is fair

and i dont blame the bearer of hard news

but that doesnt mean i dont want to smack her upside the head

damn

if honey loses his job

he loses employee insurance

except as a cobra recipient

we cant afford cobra

and it is not yet 2014

so insurance companies arent obligated to cover preexisting conditions

we had a week to figure out what we were going to do

we still had at least 2 weeks of waiting

left on the fda approval

then waiting for honeys ok

but hr at bigc were only willing to wait 1 week.

we have temporarily put this problem on hold

as hr is looking at finding a job he can do from home

which is fine

except bigc provides our cable and wifi

which goes out every day between 12 and 3 or 4

silly silly silly

and waiting some more

so it has been about 10 weeks

since honey has gotten chemo

he still takes anti seizure meds and antibiotics

he has been losing weight

a lot

he tires so easily.

he has been angry

i dont know if its life and work scares

or if blob has begun to affect him that way

he still composes.

he has been blasting out poems like crazy

he has been going to writers group

and trivia night.

he goes to the movies at least once a week

and he tries to hide

his pain from me

he has been having headaches lately

the pressure behind his eyes is severe

he has had various frozen fruit and berries

as icepacks on his forehead

 

have spoken to sn about this.

earlier today

she will talking w the nurse practioner

and get back to me

cuz drc is out of town

til the 14th

 

looks like the gas man is here

please pardon typoes

this was written on my phone

love you but not waiting

me

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2 thoughts on “the waiting game

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